The following is an excerpt from the King County Council minutes from the State of Washington.


Barbara: “I’m telling you guys, the monorail is the way to go.”

Dave: “I don’t know if I can take any more Simpson’s references, why can’t we just drop it.”

Tim: “If we drop it, we appear weak. Plus, how many cities have monorails? Imagine if we hadn’t decided to build the Space Needle because no one else had one?”

Dave: “Okay, the Needle was a great idea, but the monorail just ain’t doing it for everyone.”

Sarah: (to Barbara) “…so then the whole episode was just them saying ‘nigger’ over and over again. I just can’t believe what South Park can get away with these days.”

Tim: “What was that Sarah?”

Sarah: “Uhhhh, nothing. Just talking about South Park.”

Tim: “No, you might have something there. Everyone, what is it that the Pacific Northwest is completely lacking that all the other major cities of the country have?”

Barbara: “An aversion to beastiality?”

Dave: “Good drivers?”

Tim: “No you idiots, black people.”

Sarah: “What are those?”

Tim: “We need to show the rest of the country that Seattle isn’t an elite white city who relies solely on Microsoft and Boeing for work. We need to show America that we care about black people.”

Barbara: “Wait, if we show the country we care about black people, wouldn’t that encourage black people to move here?”

Dave: “We can’t have that.”

Tim: “I’ve thought of a novel way of making Seattle seem like they admire black people without actually encouraging them to move here. It’s been staring at us in the face for the last 40 years.”

Sarah: “Fried chicken?”

Tim: “Good guess, but no. I’m talking about King County. We change it to mean Martin Luther King Jr.”

Barbara: “Woah woah woah. Won’t the decedents of William King cause a fuss?”

Dave: “If they do, we can just call them racists.”

Tim: “Good thinking Dave, that’s the spirit.”

Meanwhile across the Sound in Jefferson County

Jethro: “So guys, I have this idea. How many of you have ever seen the show The Jeffersons?”


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